In everyone
our thought
and deeds
all shape our
hearts
our souls
to see.
With everyday
our deeds
they say
our master
chosen
our hearts
his say.
To have
two masters
is possible - not
the seeds are
sown
our lives
the cost.
With every deed
those seeds
bear fruit
our heart
revealed
we follow suit.
(same deal...copyrighted...)
5 comments:
Fantastic. Stimulating with its imagery, tantalizing in its depth, breath-taking in its simplicity. Much better than my work in every way. Very well rounded. Like a perfect spot of tea.
*blush*
thanks. i don't normally write poetry, or anything for that matter, b/c i see it as being *coughsistercough* someone elses domain...
ergo when i do actually write it i get all nervous and just wanna hide it...that way i don't step on toes and don't end up looking stupid.
but i wrote this during the break at church on sunday...kinda amusing really. i just started and immediately liked it. so i didn't feel the need to change any of it. it's nice to actually write down some of the stuff that goes though my head...
i know people take me as "carnal and stupid" or whatever, but i do listen and i do think about "deeper" stuff...i'm just not usually comfortable talking about it...usually b/c everyone i know expects me to be and act a certain way so to mention, "oh hey, i write poetry about the issues and stuff that i really care about...ya know like most people do"...well it wouldn't go over well. so in the end i just shut up.
but i'm glad you like it. it's different than your stuff b/c i see things in a different way. i paint with a different brush than you do, that doesn't make your stuff and less amazing than it is...(i'm going to have to visit your blog more often so i can prove my point;p)it just makes it unique to your perspective on life. i've had different experiences, been through different pains, and some similar ones, and they color my perspective. yours color yours and it makes it kewl. did i say that right? did you get what i meant???
Rae, there is so much to address I don't know where to start!
First of all I don't perceive you as "carnal and stupid" and if anyone ever said that about you let me know so I can destroy them. You are smart, more intelligent than I am in many ways, and you just need to feel like you can spread your wings without rejection.
Well let me tell you something, you can! You can be comfortable talking about "deeper stuff" because in reality this is a part of you that is dying to come to light but doesn't want to feel like it is getting ignored or being slighted. Which rather reminds me of a poem I once wrote about Starlight.
You can let all that pent up light get out, it's alright, in fact people would admire you for it where I come from. They would seek you out for your wisdom and words and the trial at that point would be to remain humble, which (let's face it) is still the issue here. Let me encourage you to lay down your fear of others and write to serve Him who made you. Then that way encouragement means it was glorifying to Him, and any correction really just helps you do it even better for the glory of God.
And I can identify very much with your dilemma, I also had a similar issue. Once I recognized my need for growth and was ready to lay down my pride both my attitude and my writing improved drastically.
Hope you understand what I am saying (and not saying) as well as I understand (hopefully) what you said.
Dt
lol. thanks stranger.
Beautiful in its simplicity, my dear! The meter forced me to read slowly, because the line breaks weren't where I expected them, but that's a good thing! This poem isn't something to be churned through.
The few poems that I've written have also come to me at once, and I don't want to change them. It's nice when other people can understand them, though, which doesn't always happen for me :P
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